Friday, April 26, 2013

It Could be Worse!

"Life ain't that bad,
Look what you have.
When the high's aren't so high,
just do what you can.
A world you can change,
and a life you choose.
'Cause somewhere out there,
somebody wishes they were you."
~Adelitas Way~
This is a few lines from a favorite song of mine, which has helped me get through this very difficult time in my life. The words say quite a bit to me. When I am feeling particularly down, I listen to this song. It always reminds me that no matter how tough it gets, it could always be worse. Do I ever need to be reminded of that from time to time. No matter the hardships and difficulties, someone has it even rougher.
This song also reminds me to be very grateful for what I do have. I always have God to lean on, and do I ever! I rely on Him so very much! Even though I am going through a rough patch, I am truly blessed! The Lord has given me so much! I don't have much in money or material things, but I have my life, my family and friends, which mean the world to me. I do Facebook an awful lot, that's the best way I know to keep up, since I do not have many that are in Indiana! My friends especially have been amazingly comforting to me lately!
I just read Baldwin's Going to Meet the Man, WOW! That poor, poor, man! He had it the worst. The story made me feel shock, amazement, and yes, even horror. It was a wonderful story, telling it like it was, but I felt terrible for the poor soul. My first husband's grandmother used to tell of a lynching she went to in Kentucky when she was a young girl-I thank the Good Lord people do not do that anymore and that I never had to witness anything so cruel. Baldwin also reminded me that I have it pretty darn good! Great story!

Monday, April 22, 2013

Life is too Short to Waste

In The Snows of Kilimanjaro, by E. Hemingway, I was reminded very much about all the things I, too, would like to write about. I find myself wondering if I will ever do it, or if I will get the time, before time runs out. I have had a temporary case of writer’s block lately. My dream is to publish my poetry, even if I get the only copy! But I feel, my best poetry is locked away inside me somewhere, and he best is yet to come. I also wonder if that’s really the attitude to have, because this story also reminded me that there may not be a tomorrow, as no one is promised another day.

Another project, which I may undertake one day, is writing a book about how it feels to be Bi-Polar, especially the very deep, dark depressions that come along with this disorder. I have some journals from a particularly dark time in my life that I will probably incorporate into the book.  I want others to know that they are not alone and those of us with this disorder do know how they feel.

The truth is that I am not getting any younger, so maybe, just maybe I will begin to write again soon! I have found that for me writing just plain and simply make me feel better, especially through the rough times. I do believe that in reading The Snows of Kilimanjaro, has possibly awakened my dreams and I might take my dreams off the back burner soon!

Writing is a great diversion for most anything. Life is too short to waste by putting our dreams on hold. Our hopes and dreams are ours totally and we should never let them go and strive for them!

Me having a good day!

Sunday, April 21, 2013

The Ritual

This is a poem I have written and re-written. I started this poem 9 years ago. It consisted of maybe 8 lines total. I didn't really like it, so I worked on it more during my Creative Writing course. I was basically inspired by numerous thunderstorms we were having at the time and I always had a fascination with the occult. I do not practice any such thing, I just like to read and learn about it. During this time I also had read quite a number of Anne Rice novels-I love her and her style of writing, it drew me into the stories! She, I would say, was also a bit of inspiration for this poem. It  is one of my favorites that I have written so far!

The Ritual
White, sweeping dress- simple, nothing fancy.
Barefoot in the grass
Skin is pale milky moonlight
soft, creamy silk.
Hateful, burning, cat eyes-
large and bright, green embers glowing.
Hair-black raven
long, dark carefree flowing.
Ferocious nails, blood red,
thin, twiggy fingers.
Enchanting book in left hand,
athame in right.
Standing rigid- quiet, purposeful pose.
Meadow- shadows all around.
Stars shimmer, moon glimmers
She bows her head, prays to ancient gods.
Air is warm and placid,
tranquility abounds- peaceful…
She comes alive,
performing, perverse, ancient ritual,
dance of the strange.
Mischievous, mystical, mysterious,
this solitary maiden.
The dance now over,
pink lips begin to move,
singing the song of trance.
Her voice sultry,
satin soft, alluringly sweet,
as the blood of fruit.
She now chants,
Vibrant and clear…
Faster and faster, call of the wild.
Sweat beading on her brow face aglow.
She chants, she sings, she laughs, she screams.
Ancient drumbeats fill the air.
Spirits rise.
Wind is breezy, sky alight,
lightning flashes, thunder rolls-
howls from within.
She sings with the thunder,
dances with the lightning.
Abruptly the ritual is over-
the four winds have spoken-
book closes, athame falls to the ground.
Hands limp; lips pause and pout.
Hair, a hundred black ribbons,
plastered to her face.
Prim, proper she isn’t, wild, obscure, of course.
Under the silver moon- big, bold, above,
in the shadows of the meadow…
Ancient drumbeats fade away,
Ritual now closes,
With the magic of this night.

Friday, April 12, 2013

Nick, Daisy, and Me

I totally enjoyed reading The Great Gatsby.  The characters I most relate to are Nick and Daisy.

First, I relate to Nick because I am a by-stander as he was. I prefer to be on the side-lines not drawing attention to myself. I like to listen, observe, and learn. I feel Nick was very unobtrusive; he did not pry into other’s personal problems or their lives, he basically observed. I am quite a bit like that, I do not like to hear the details of gossip or “he said, she said”, it’s none of my business, but for some reason people love to gossip to me, I think this is because they KNOW I will not repeat it. Nick is a lot like that.

I can relate to Daisy on one point: I know the feelings she must have had and the betrayal and hurt she felt at being cheated on in her marriage. I have had the same luck. Other than that point, I am nothing like Daisy; she was following the money and loved her rich lifestyle. I, unlike Daisy, do for myself. She didn’t seem capable of doing much of anything for herself or on her own.
Your present circumstances don't determine where you can go; they merely determine where you start. ~Nido Qubein~